R.i.p

[CAPTAINZING]

It is important for men to remember that,
as women grow older,
it becomes harder for them
to maintain the same quality of housekeeping
as when they were younger.
When you notice this,
try not to yell at them.
Some are oversensitive,
and
there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.
My name is Ron...
Let me relate
how I handled the situation with my wife,
Julie.
When I took "early retirement" last year,
it became necessary for Julie to get a full-time job,
both for extra income
and for the health benefits that we needed.
Shortly after she started working,
I noticed she was beginning to show her age.
I usually get home from the golf course
about the same time she gets home from work.
Although she knows how hungry I am,
she almost always says
she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner.
I don't yell at her.
Instead,
I tell her to take her time
and
just wake me
when she gets dinner on the table.
I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club
so eating out is not reasonable.
I'm ready for some home cooked grub
when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating.
But now
it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours
after dinner.
I do what I can
by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening
that they won't clean themselves.
I know she really appreciates this,
as it does seem to motivate her
to get them done before she goes to bed.
Another symptom of aging is complaining,
I think.
For example,
she will say that it is difficult for her to find time
to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour.
But,
boys,
we take 'em for better or worse,
so I just smile
and offer encouragement.
I tell her to stretch it out
over two or even three days.
That way she won't have to rush so much.
I also remind her
that missing lunch completely now and then
wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean)!
I like to think tact
is one of my strong points.
When doing simple jobs,
she seems to think she needs more rest periods.
She had to take a break
when she was only half finished mowing the yard.
I try not to make a scene.
I'm a fair man.
I tell her to fix herself a nice,
big,
cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade
and just sit for a while.
And,
as long as she is making one for herself,
she may as well make one
for me too.
I know
that I probably look like a saint
in the way I support Julie.
I'm not saying
that showing this much consideration is easy.
Many men will find it difficult.
Some will find it impossible!
Nobody
knows better than I do
how frustrating women get
as they get older.
However,
guys,
even if you just use a little more tact
and less criticism of your aging wife
because of this article,
I will consider
that writing it was well worthwhile.
After all,
we are put on this earth
to help each other.
Signed,
Ron

EDITITOR'S NOTE:
Ron died suddenly on October 3rd.
He was found with a Calloway extra long 50- inch Big Bertha Driver
II
rammed up his ass,
with only 2 inches of grip showing!
His wife Julie was arrested,
but the all-woman Grand Jury
accepted her defense
that he accidentally sat down on it very suddenly.