Anyone stuggling? Post here!!

[Velvet]

Muse and Missy are right on with their posts. You don't even want me to begin telling you what I am going through....EVERY day of my life. But yet I cope. I deal with what is handed to me the best I can. Yes, it's true...you're thinking...she isn't even alcoholic so what does she know....but I could easily have a couple drinks to escape the reality of my life, but would that make any situation better? Make it go away? No.
You've got to dig deep into yourself, Gi. Be damn tired of ruining your days and bf's plans for a good life. Get pissed at yourself and do something about it!

[Muse]

I understand the crisis thing. My life was full of drama. Why? My drinking created it. I was making bad choices and was unable to make good decisions because I was always drunk. I played poor me. This has happened, and that has happened. Not once did it occur to me that it wouldn't have happened if I hadn't put myself in a bad situation or if I hadn't added alcohol into the mix. The result, a messed up life filled with crisis.

Quite honestly, the bumps in the road I face today I don't view as drama or crisis. I view them as a problem that I need to work on finding a solution for. Thus far, there has always been a solution no matter how big the problem. Get out of crisis mode. It is not worth it. I don't miss it one bit. Your mind gets used to that lifestyle. Trust me, if you walk away from it and move ahead, you will not miss it or want it.

[Rocketman]

I have to agree with the others.
Most of my problems are self inflicted. Alcohol only adds fuel to the fire.

[indigo]

I have had & still have my plate full, I accept that this is my life. I self medicated with drink & drugs for more years than I care to remember...then I too realized I was making my life & my loved ones worse that ever I stopped with the drink & drugs it wasn't easy it had to be done & it was the best thing I ever did. Gi please change your mindset it's not healthy to 'thrive on cisis' mode you change your way of thinking get back to ACT do your homework & build a life instead of an existance. You can do this.

[Giyana]

Life's problems each day. I look back at the innocent glass of wine I had 2 months ago, and think about the chaos begun then.

What a mess we can create while we are drinking....

Gi

[indigo]

To us alcoholics Gi a glass of wine is never innocent, it's poison & if there was a label on that glass that read 'lethal' would it still look as innocent?

[Rocketman]

Wroking dayshift for one month has been tough. I kill a 12 pack everynight.
I am going on vacation next week. When I return I will be working nightshift.
My goal is to join all you quitters on July 23.

[Velvet]

Question Rocketman.....why wait until July 23? Feel like you gotta get that last 12 pack in? Making excuses, sounds like to me. I work dayshift....12 hours a day...up at 5....come home from one job, get dinner, go to second job....come home throw in a load of laundry, don't get to bed until 11:30 most nights and back at it the next day. You don't think that's tough? I don't throw back a 12 pack each night...if I did I'd be dead.
I realize you work hard at coalmining, but you're killing yourself with the alcohol. You know I respect you, but time to get busy on recovery.

[Rocketman]

It's called procrastination Velvet. Something I am a pro at.
I know me & I know I wouldn't make it this soon in Mexico. I am tired of being a falier.
You remember how hard it is to quit smoking right?
Also I agree with you about the 12 pack every night. Believe me, I feel it every morning.
I have always admired you for working so hard.
Thanks for the words I need to hear and listen to.

[Velvet]

Love your avatar Rocketman. Did you make it yourself?
Don't mean to get down on you, but care about you and hope some day you'll be ready.

[Rocketman]

I know Velvet. Thanks.
Someone here at the village was making avatars for everyone.
I cant remember who. Maybe Daisy

[Velvet]

I have one with my name on it that BlueEyes made. It's very cute. (of course)

[afrita]

I'm pretty sure it was Ayla Zaire making the avatars.

[Velvet]

Oh yeah, I remember her making some and she made some for me. I've got them in a file somewhere.....I think. The one BlueEyes made for me is on my photobucket. I like them when they have your name on them. I need to learn how to do that. Miss Done can do that too. It's just a matter of taking the time to learn......

[remi]

Rocketman, I am thinking of you.

Today is my Day 21. I don't have a lot of time to write because I am just getting back from my grandmother's funeral and work is insane, but I am even more than ever convinced I need to do whatever it takes to stay sober. I spent some time with an alcohlic friend over the weekend and he made me realize what I don't want to have happen to me.

[Chy]

Remi, you are doing so awesome, you have made it through a difficult time SOBER! Just goes to show if we want it bad enough we can make it through anything, anyone, any situation, any crisis, any shortcoming any excuse....sober!

Jeff, hurry back on the bus now, it's been to long. I'm worried about you too friend.

[Rocketman]

Keep up the good work remi.
Thanks Chy.

[remi]

Welcome to day 22 for me! I'm good and I'm happy with my decision. I had a brief tinge where I really wished I could have some wine when I got home last nite, but luckily it passed and I made it through the day. Much strength to everyone today!

[Myra]

Hey all,

I wanted to go to an AA meeting today, but I'm feeling too queasy to want to drive anywhere in this heat (It's almost 100 degrees). I forget if I've said much about all the ups and downs of medication changes I've been through lately, but suffice to say that while I am taking my medicine as prescribed, I'm still feeling pretty sickly. I lost about 10 lbs. in a week and was diagnosed with gastritis. During that week, I also didn't sleep, as I was going through a rather abrupt benzo withdrawal. (I'm tapering off them now, because a week of constant panic attacks and no sleep is not a week I want to re-live.)

This Tuesday I'm having a diagnostic procedure done where they shoot my back full of dye and a local anesthetic. If the anesthetic temporarily helps my back pain, they may do a nerve burn in the same location later. (Also, I guess the doctor will learn something when he sees where the dye does or doesn't go) My sis-in-law is taking me to and from the procedure, thus making her eligible for the best Sister-In-Law-Ever Award, I do believe.

I worked last week after not working for about 10 days due to all the Ranygazoo described above. (Ranygazoo means "nonesense"--It's 1920s slang; Indulge me.) I made it through the week, just barely. It's good to know I can still work. I still need to find another line of work, though. Waitressing into my 50s and 60s doesn't sound like a good plan.

Okey doke. I just thought I'd post because I'm not making the meeting. My husband has given me a stack of books on meditation, self hypnosis, and other techniques to deal with pain, etc. I know they've been helpful to him, because he's in so much more pain than I and take so much less for it.

I hope you all are well.

Giyana, how are you doing, lady?

Rocketman, I know how hard it is to have to muscle through the work week, although I can only imagine that coal-mining might be a wee bit harder physically than waitressing! So, my hat is off to you, but I still hope you'll find a way to lay off the beers soon.

Best,

Myra

[remi]

I'm here...sick as a dog...but still sober. Concerned about a friend of mine who has been struggling, but has been out of touch, thus I worry. It reminds me that it's good to check in during the "struggling" phase so that others know you're ok..or that you need their help. My cold is kicking my ass, but sobriety is still a part of my life.

Love to you all.