I promised to

[laurie6781]

fill you all in on what's been going on.

Wasn't sure where to put this, but decided this forum was the best. I will apologize in advance that this may be long.

Some of you know, and some of you don't that I have been gone the last 3 weeks to Florida. Here's what happened. Bear with me, have to go back a way to explain.

Many, and I do mean MANY years ago, I had a 'first love.' We really thought that we would marry, have kids, live our lives together, etc. At first our parents were for our relationship. Then, something happened, we never did figure out what, maybe something to do with his dad and mine in business, but both sets of parents 'decided' we weren't 'good enough' for each other and they put a plan into action that somehow 'drove a wedge between us.' We never broke up, just 'drifted' apart.

We started dating in late May Early June of 1964 and 'drifted apart' in early 1966. In late '66 (just prior to my first marriage, I wasn't 100% sure you could say) I tried to call him. Finally called the family business and was told by his youngest brother that he (my love T) didn't want anything to do with me and I was to never call the plant again. I married Don. In the summer of '69 T called my folks house and got the same message from my mother and married his first wife.

When I got sober in '81 I started to try to find him again with no luck. In '83, my sister (the biotch) and her then husband ran into T in the Caymans, where he proceeded to give her his card, with ALL his contact info on it to give to me. SHE NEVER DID. (That in itself is a whole separate thread I need to do on RESENTMENT).

Now over the years, especially with the advent of the internet I CONTINUED TO try and find him ............................................. without success. By 2007 I had actually become OBSESSIVE about it and was driving myself insane. In Octobor of '07 I finally said ENOUGH. I had to accept I would NEVER find him or see him again, and that was that. It has been hard!!!! Especially, since after our drifting apart, in March of '66, I had a tattoo put on my upper right arm of a T and an L merged into one and it has been there ever since. Would not even consider having it removed all these years.

Never say never!!!!!

Fast forward to 1/07/10 at about 9:08am my time. Phone rang, didn't recognize the number but answered. All I can say is that it is a good thing that I have an "Executive Chair" with arms that I sit in when on my puter, or I would have fallen out of my chair. It was T.

44 YEARS LATER!

The main reason I was unable to find him is that he had been living 'out of country' the past 30+ years. We talked for an hour and a half and when we hung up I bawled like a baby.

Now if anybody wrote this in a novel, no one would believe it. I talked with Chy that day and several others as I was 'bouncing' off the walls, didn't know if I was coming or going, didn't know what to think was just all over the place. He called again that afternoon and we talked for another 5 hours.

From that day forward, we have been on the phone at least 8 or 9 hours every day until 2/10/07 when I flew to Florida to be with him. There were 2 weekends when he came here for short visits before that.

I was suppose to come home the 26th but extended my return until yesterday. And have to admit I did not want to come home. However, we both have some 'things' that we MUST do, so our 'relationship' is going to be a 'catch as catch can' for the next 2 to 3 months before we can have some extended time together again.

A little bit more about this ........................ both of my marriages were to men that in some ways were like T, had some of his characteristics and personalty, but, of course, were not him and I could not (big surprise) change them. lol Both of his marriages were to women that in some ways were like me, had come of my characteristics and personalty, but of course, were not me and he could not change them. lol

On top of that, while in Florida, we seemed to run into couples that had 'found' each other again after time spans of 35 to 45 years, roflmao

So, for right now, we are taking this as it comes. No majors changes in either of our lives, but definitely minor ones, so we can continue to pursue this and see where it leads us next.

On an additional note in conjunction with this, I now have 2.7 flying hours of instruction toward the 10 hours I need before I can solo. I have some studying to do so I can take the 'ground test' and then once I solo I will get my 'pilots license' for VFR (Visual Flight Rules) and can then move forward from there. I cannot express how FANTASTIC it is to be up in the sky, flying a plane, it is just INCREDIBLE!!!!!

I find out Friday the exact date that my Stomach Banding will be done, so I can finally get this damn diabetes in remission. That in turn will tell me how soon I can pursue Skeet Shooting (yep, I love it). Going to get a new 12 gauge shotgun in the next week or so, so that after the banding as soon as Dr says okay I can practice with my Son In Law and Granddaughter, lol

Now I think I will go back to bed for a bit, as I am still on East Coast time and need a few more 'winks' of sleep before I actually get out and about today.

More later.

Love and hugs,

[indigo]

Well Laurie you know how happy I am for the both of you dear friend.

[Hopefloats]

Me too Laurie. We all deserve a happy ending to our love story, and that was a love story. I cannot imagine someone not giving me a message from ANYONE. I cannot imagine how you feel about that. I suppose that will have to be a huge process. I know we go right TO anger first, naturally. We of course wonder what could of been, yet we somehow know that things unfold just AS they are supposed to. I am willing to bet that there will be a blessing in all of this "timing."

I love EVERY part of your story except I RUN when someone says FLYING! LOL I am happy that you are happy but you will never see me UP THERE waving at you! lol

[Chy]

You know I'm very happy for you to, life throws us some really nice curve balls so catch them when you can dear. Can I place odds on how this story ends yet? LOL

[bubblegum]

hehe Chy me too me too......

(are we gonna be invited to the wedding??)

I am happy that you are so happy.

[Hopefloats]

Oh Chy, let's start taking bets? I need some money! LOL

[laurie6781]

Don't waste your money folks. He and I both see NO REASON to marry. We're too old to have kids (at least my baby maker is gone, rofl).

Live together the rest of our lives, yep that is a definite possibility ........................ marriage not a good bet at this time. Hell, I can't even say we would 'live' together full time, as we both need our space, lol I suspect this will last if we continue to take these 'breaks' from each other, lmao

Well, you get the idea ..........................................

Just does not seem to be a 'necessity.'

Love and hugs,

[Hopefloats]

Sorry we were marrying you off Laurie! BUT we are having fun! Okay living in sin.........
YES I approve! LOL (just kidding)

[laurie6781]

Oh I think "living in sin" is MUCH MORE FUN!!!!!!!!!

ROFLMAO

Have your fuN, I am enjoying all of this so much!

Love and hugs,

[Giyana]

Laurie!! So happy for you in this improbable adventure. Can't wait for the next chapter,

xoxo Gianna

[morning_glory]

~ sigh~ How Romantic, Laurie!!! I bet your *heart* is flying! I am happy for you and totally agree about you both being in reality about your needs for SPACE!! YOU GO, GIRL!!

[Muse]

Wow! That is quite an amazing story. You have so many exciting things going on. I wish you the best and I'm very happy that you are so happy. Very cool...

[nogard]

This is Fantastic Laurie, thanks for sharing it with us

[Rocketman]

Too awesome Laurie.
Good things happen to those that wait.
Best wishes.

[Little Missy]

[Velvet]

Lots of rainbows in my vision here. I'm happy for you!

[justme59]

Oh Laurie
I am SO happy for you , how amazing !

HUGX
Leigh

[laurie6781]

Thought I would do a bit of an update, lol

T will be here next weekend, then goes out of country for several weeks.

However, have already booked a 'quick turn around trip' of 4 days in mid April to spend time with him during his 'birthday' rofl.

So even though we won't have any 'long' visits until later this year, we are already working in 'short' ones.

Am I happy? YOU BET I AM!!!!! I have had friends tell me several things:

You look younger than you ever have.

You have an 'aura' about you I have never seen.

You are smiling all the time.

I have never seen you this happy.

So ................................... yes this has and is good for me. My cousin said some things to me last night .............................. about all I have done, that I 'deserve' this happiness in my life. I have to digest that one. First didn't think I had done that much over the years, but in retrospect I guess she is right ........................ as part of my own personal recovery, I have tried to be available to folks that ask for help and still do. It has become a 'natural' part of the way I function. Guess those early folks in AA knew what they were talking about when they 'coined' the phase to 'be of service.' Now true they did mean it for working with another alkie/addict and in my early years that is what I did. Then I found that 'being of service' could apply to so much more and has been.

Was I looking for a 'pay off'? Yep, my continued recovery. Did I expect more than that? I don't believe so.

I am so grateful that once I found recovery I didn't again succumb to the cravings, that with the help of HP, when the alligators were nipping at my azz I learned how to drain the swamp and keep moving forward. I am even more grateful that with HP's help I didn't leave before 'the miracle.'

I guess this is all to say to those of you out there that may be 'struggling' right now, KEEP MOVING FORWARD. You do not know what life has in store for you, but I can pretty much guarantee that no matter how bad it may seem in sobriety at a particular moment it will still be 1000% better than it was your best day drinking.

J M H O

Love and hugs,

[Rocketman]

(((Laurie)))
Yes you have helped so many of us.
Yes you do deserve yet another meirical.
I am so happy for you girl.

[Hopefloats]

You Go Laurie! I could not be happier for you. I have always believed in "hanging in there" for that next best thing. We just do not know what is coming our way.

It is really nice to take this journey with you. Really nice. Thanks for sharing with us!!!!!!