Welshgirl

[welshgirl]

Hello everyone i hope this reaches someone i am new well joined lastnight so not sure if i am doing it right.I am 46 married female with one 16yr old daughter. I am fom the uk.
I didnt start drinking til i was 21 didnt like the taste, then i discovered white wine. Whenever i cant face things i drink although thats how it was. I have been sober for 2 days the last time i gave up was last April for 5 weeks i never felt better, i then thought id be ok and have the odd one i know i cant. I can easily drink a bottle a night. If we go out i cant have just a few i have to get wasted, so i now know i have to give up its upsetting my lovely husband and daughter.
I have had a few hardships in my life and sort of felt i deserved a drink.

[Rocketman]

Hi Welshgirl.
No words of wisdom from me at the moment as I am still struggling.
I assure you that others will be along shortly.
Keep coming back.

[cody]

welcome to the Village Welshgirl

Good for you for getting 2 days of sobriety under your belt again, and for recognizing that you can't control your alcohol consumption, despite your good intentions. I can totally relate to having hardship and feeling "entitled" to drink. Unfortunately, in my experience, those drinks ended up costing me big time, and were much more of a burden than a relief. That's when I realized I needed to come up with some other, healthier ways to handle dealing with hardship.

I hope you will look for other ways to manage your stress/hardship, as those types of things seem to be a constant in life. Alcohol does not need to be a constant though, and like you found last April, you never felt better while being 5 weeks sober.

I hope you will continue to post here; you've found a wonderful community of folks who understand what you are going through, many of whom have had success in getting sober and staying sober

[Velvet]

Welcome! You've come to right place for support and words of wisdom. Glad you decided to seek out some help. Two days and counting, right?

[zanna]

Hi Welshgirl. Glad to see you have found your way here.

I was born in Wales, though my parents were English. Left there when I was almost 4 - but I still remember things. Of course that was a very long time ago; where we lived was still very rural.

zanna

[welshgirl]

Hi everyone for your replies and helpfull advice.
The weekend starts tomorrow and have decided to lie low because i feel too tempting to be in a situation where people are going to question why im not drinking.Also 5th day of not drinking but i have had week off work to slob around need to get back next week. Its just being in that situation cos we did go to pub most evenings, i know i have to change things around for a while until i feel confident to be in those situations.
On a more positive note feel better today got up late had a nice bath and have put some makeup on, going to cook nice meal for my little family. I feel fine at home just dread going out again to be honest, might go for walk later with hubby and our 2 dogs, lucky to live right on coast a beautiful part of Wales. Abit apprehensive as sometimes after a walk we would go to pub. It is amazing really my whole life centred around the next drink. I know i have to change my life around. Do you believe that alcohol is addictive? and the craving stops after a while? x

[indigo]

Try & make your week from work full & positivive to keep your mind off those demons. Wishing you well.

[Chy]

Glad to see you made it over!
Yes I believe for some alcohol can be addictive, eventually the cravings get easier to bear until they eventually diminish. This takes TIME though it won't happen overnight but the more and longer you don't feed the addiction the stronger you become and the weaker it becomes.

[cody]

good for you on Day 5, and to be lying low, avoiding situations that might tempt you to drink. I think you are wise to be working on changing your routine so that you aren't around situations where ppl are drinking and encouraging you to join them. We'll be around here on the weekend, so feel free to post here instead of going to the pub

[welshgirl]

Aah, thankyou Chy and Cody for your help and advice. I do understand the longer you dont drink the less the cravings are. Have had a better day today went for a walk at 6 time id usually be having my first glass, then as soon as we got home i had already cooked supper so ate straight away, feel if iv eaten dont crave so much for a drink. Its hard to believe that i will never drink again! and then you start to think maybe i wasnt that bad im sure i could go back to just having a few at the weekend. But i know ive tried that and it doesnt work, i wonder what makes people like us not able to just have a few? It is really good to write down your feelings down,
Thanks so much, Sarah

[Velvet]

Sarah, Try to avoid saying, that I will NEVER drink again. Instead say....I will not drink today. Then repeat the next day and the next......
Good for you for changing your routine....stay busy and like cody said, avoid drinking situations.
Congratulations for coming this far!!

[indigo]

Yes the thought of never drinking again is quite daunting but in tiny chunks it's palletable. All the best to you gal.

[welshgirl]

Thankyou Velvet and Indigo for your helpful replies, Yes you are right just take one day at a time. Here on Sunday it is Mothers Day and my mums birthday, so to celebrate we were all going to the local chinese for dinner, i hate letting people down but i think its too soon to b socialising, and i do believe people are not taking me seriously when i say look im not drinking and its too soon to join in yet!
Have any of you read a book by Alan Carr called some thing like How to cut down on Alcohol it is excellent and helped me give up last time my mistake was to think id be ok after 5 weeks to return to "normal drinking" but obivously that doesnt work. The book is good in a way that you dont give up using the willpower method but when you have finished reading the book you realise that alcohol is just evil and we just dont need it! Its hard to explain but i would reccommend it!
I dont feel like going out at all, just enjoying knitting, stitching, watching telly and i have a really good book on the go. When i look in the mirror i can see my skin has become a bit blotchy i just hope i havent done any longterm damage inside my body!
Bye for now speak later and once again thanks for the support,
Sarah xxx

[Giyana]

Sarah, you are doing very well and I think it is usually the prudent decision to not go to social occasions where there is drinking early on in sobriety. Congratulations on the days you have and your enthusiasm; keep rolling girl!

Gianna

[Rocketman]

Congrats Sarah.
You are doing great.
Don't listen to the crazy little voices in your head.
They say, if you don't want to slip, stay out of slippery places.

[Phillips]

WG, I'm not in much of a position to speak, but I have been here long enough to say that what you have written is a part reflection of my own experience with drink. You think you go it licked, then WHAM!, you're back doing it.

FWIW, I had four days under my belt this week, then slipped up in a very casual manner - like it just leapt out at me. It happens, you are certainly not alone in that.

My current abstinence is part of a diet to lose weight, and I was motivated by finding out just how many calories there are in alcoholic drinks. Really brought home to me how useless drink really is.

Anyway, good luck, and have a nice weekend.

[welshgirl]

Just am so pleased with myself been out for family meal (wasnt going to go) but decided i would prove to myself that i would be ok and i was> It was fine just drank tonic water, have just got home and am so pleased with myself. Usually i would want to stay out til id had my fill, then just come home and straight to bed.It was so nice watching people, and seeing lots worse for ware, and i felt great!. Still managed to enjoy myself ok i wasnt as loud as normal but then again i can wake up in the morning with a clear head and not worry about what ive done and said. XX

Sarah goodnight X

[Giyana]

Well, Welshgirl, we should all read this every day. It is what sobriety is all about.

Thanks, Gianna

[cody]

Good for you Sarah I knew you could do it! Reading your post just brings a HUGE smile on my face. Thanks so much for letting us know how your day went Sleep well, get plenty of rest, and keep up the good work!

[LuckyV2]

Welcome to The Sober Village, I just saw this and I think that you are doing wonderful. This is a journey that isn't always going to be bearable but it is doable if we just follow in the footsteps of those that have been sober for awhile. Just wanted to say hi and keep it up!