Contradiction I can't resolve - help

[Charon]

Disclaimer: I am agnostic at best.

I ended up at a meeting that I thought was discussion but turned out to be step. The step was 3. It seemed that much of the chapter we read was babble, written by someone that was less than coherent. Nonetheless, I listened attentively. It seems that the chapter shared one thing that I hear so often at meetings. "You have to give it all up to god". "Let go completely", "You have to let god do it all", "Let go, let god" Etc, Etc, etc.

OK here's the contradiction - why is the serenity prayer so central to AA. It's the ending at many/most of the meetings I attend. It's on every coin. And the second part is "the courage to change the things I can". Directly opposite to "give it up completely".

I won't buy any twisted tortured interpretation trying to use the third part - "and the wisdom to know the difference". That just doesn't fly. But if anyone can reconcile this contradiction for me I would love to hear it.

Thanks.

PS. I'm sure you can imagine what the Nuns in Catholic school thought of me. I had questions from about 5th grade on. It was there I first heard "Shut up, sit down and listen. Just accept it. We have all the answers. You are just a child".