Daily Surrender - Step 1

[Recovery Rocks]

"We are powerless over alcohol and our lives have become unmanageable"

I must surrender to step 1 each and every day. Alcohol is such a bigger stronger (evil) foe than I - I am dwarfed by it - I can not fight it - I have to surrender absolutely. I can not harbor any resistance (ie I might be able to drink normally again). I must "Surrender to Win". There is freedom in Surrender.

I use this surrender in my morning mediation when I establish contact with my higher power. This surrender comes first - then I ask to be "relieved of the bondage of self " (Step 3 prayer). If I do this my day goes nicely - sometimes I have to repeat the process when life throws a curve ball. If I do my serenity returns. If I don't .... you know the story.

I'm interested to hear others experience with "Surrender".

Be well, Brent

[Little Missy]

Surrendering to Win the Fight was a foreign concept to me. I was so use to fighting, that it took a conscience effort on my part to practice "surrendering".

I had finally realized that I had a problem, so I was trying my best not to drink. And I'm sure all you alcoholics are aware of "white knuckling" it. And that's what I was doing. I was fighting the urge to drink. I was trying to use will power and strength to get through these urges. What was happening was, I was feeding the addiction. The more I faught it, the more I wanted to drink, and the stronger the addictive thoughts became. WTH is up with that!?! By concentrating so much on it, trying to fight it, I was giving it more power.

Some very wise people in AA taught me about surrendering. Giving my problem over to a power greater then myself. Asking for help instead of trying to go at it alone. Eeeeew!! So unfamiliar and not fun!! But I gave it a try...and it worked. And at the same time that I'm thinking cool that worked, I'm thinking, damn, that worked. Because at that time, I'm still thinking I could be that hopeless case. Almost wanting to be that hopeless case, so I could say, "Hey I tried AA and it didn't work." and I could continue my drinking.

Instead, I kept practicing the surrendering part. And I'm sure the old Don't Quit gang remembers passing the knee pads around, LOL because that was all I seemed to get done, was hitting my knees to pray and surrender. Asking HP to remove my desire to drink, even if all that came out of my mouth was a sobbing "God help me."

Not one time, when I took action, asked HP for help, and was willing to accept it, was I denied it. Not one time!!

Now for me, that was pretty powerful stuff. And with time and practice surrendering has gotten a lot easier. It not only pertains to drinking for me anymore, I also use it in my daily life.

Surrendering does not make me weak. In fact, it does just the opposite, it makes me stronger. It gives me peace, it helps me to see things as they are instead of what my addictive brain wants me to see them as. Surrendering gives me freedom!!

Today, I know I am not that hopeless case. I worked for that freedom from alcohol, and now I also have experience, strength, and hope.

What a gift sobriety is!! Thanks for letting me share.