Mels bumps,

[h4lov909]

Well here is a news flash LIFE SUCKS. BUTTT....

We can handle it sober, I am going through my first sober crises. My DH just admited to me that he had an affair for a year, with my x-best friend.
This last year while I have been trying to get sober and riding the relapse train, he has been horribly mean and non-supportive. Many of you are familiar with my poor me stories.
But this time he could truly see a change in me. He sees a strength he has never seen before.
How do I feel????? Hurt: Betrayed: Sick: and weirdly OKAY
All the thing I have learned about myself though my IOP and AA now are coming into play. In one way I am relieved I thought all this time I was a horrible person although I did do some not so nice things and yes had some part in the down slide of our marriage IT IS NOT ALL ME!!!
The ball is in my court he wants to stay, but he has offered me a very fair fiancial settlement should I choose for him to leave.
I have made our family life hell for 6 years. he had an affair , do I accept the blame? NO do I accept having a part YES
My biggest question maybee some of you have had to deal with this, I have visual pictures in my head of them together, will these ever go away, i know time helps, this is a new wound.
Now its time to make some decesions make soom lists etc...