Living my life!

[LaTeeDa]

I’ve been talking and planning with my kids about a vacation over Easter break. We had talked about driving down to San Francisco and spending a few days sightseeing and taking in museums, etc. We also talked about Monterey and the aquarium. Then, when I was online checking hotel prices, an ad caught my eye for condos at Vail. I used to ski a lot when I was younger and both my kids have taken skiing/snowboarding through the schools. It really awoke something in me thinking about a family ski vacation.

I brought this up at our last couple therapy session and my husband reacted predictably. “I’m not invited, am I?” So I told him of course he was invited. He proceeded to express how low he would feel coming along on a trip with me paying his way…………….. WTF? I told him that he was invited as a paying member of the team, not a guest. He then said “Oh, so I’m invited, but not that invited, huh?”

Well, I had to bite my tongue, but luckily our counselor spoke up. She said it seemed to her that he was acting like a 15-year old who was expecting mom to take him on a trip and all he had to do was show up a bring a little spending money. We then had a long discussion about this and his attitude toward money and responsibility.

Today I booked the trip………..for one adult and two children. I am so excited I could almost pee my pants! I hope I still remember how to ski. We are going to Steamboat Springs, one of my all time favorite places. I haven’t been there in probably 20 years, and it’s been almost that long since the last time I skied. I am having some (very mild) guilty feelings about doing this without him, but my excitement is much stronger than my guilt. I do love him and want to be with him, but will not pay for and support him. The sooner he realizes this, the better. We talked about it and I told him I want him to come with us next time we go on a trip, so if that’s what he wants, too, he should start thinking about that and planning for it now.

I still don’t know what will happen with us, but I am finally doing something I want to do regardless of what he does. It feels great! :great:

L