Codependency

[Little Missy]

As most of you know, I'm an alcoholic. Resently it has come to my attention that I am also codependent. Just what I needed, something else to work on!! lol

I'm reading "Codependent no more" and of course, it decribes me. I'm sitting here thinking...how the hell did this happen!?! Then I'm like, who cares how this happened, how the hell do ya fix it!?!

As suggested, I have started jounaling about it...yes on paper with a pen!! lol I tend to try to make everyone around me happy, and I fail miserably at it. You'd think through AA I would have learned better, can't change anyone but myself. I feel resentful (which is bad news for an alcoholic), unappreciated, lost, alone, empty, depressed, crazy, and basically, like everything I touch turns to shit.

I try to take on the world, be everything to everyone, try to not cause trouble, keep the peace, don't rock the boat. I let other peoples moods effect me. I take on more, to take the stress off of others. I protect those I love and carry burdens by myself.

I'm tired of doing "everything", only to be asked/expected to do more. I'm fed up with the whole thing. The more I do, the more that needs to be done. It's like nothing I try is working.

Anybody else feel like this!?!